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Elon Musk Somehow Became A Top Ranked Diablo IV Player In-Between Cheerleading For Trump
5.11.2024
Elon Musk is the world’s richest man with over $200 billion in net worth right now. He could go anywhere and do anything and he has apparently chosen to spend an inordinate number of hours grinding for loot in Diablo IV. The Tesla CEO revealed on the Joe Rogan podcast in a surprise, last-minute...
Elon Musk Accused Of Stealing Blade Runner 2049 Imagery To Sell Teslas In New Lawsuit
21.10.2024
Last week, Elon Musk revealed his Robotaxis at a Tesla Cybercab event on a Hollywood movie lot filled with theatrical flourishes aimed at evoking a neon-fueled sci-fi future. A new lawsuit filed on Monday now accuses the tech billionaire of using AI to generate Blade Runner 2049-style imagery after...
Police Department Woefully Misunderstands Terminator Movies By Using Theme Music To Introduce New Cybertruck
12.10.2024
The city of Irvine, California’s police department officially introduced its cringy new Tesla Cybertruck on Tuesday to the public in the most cringe way possible: a dorky video featuring theme music from “The Terminator,” a franchise that famously portrays cops in a poor light. Read more
Tesla’s Cybertruck Causes A Maddening Bug In Fortnite
11.8.2024
The Cybertruck has been a menace on America’s roads since it launched, slicing open one owner’s leg, annoying residents of Maine and trapping all kinds of limbs in its openings. Now, it turns out that the angular atrocity is also ruining the virtual world as well.Read more
This Might Be One Of The Worst Things Fortnite's Ever Done
22.7.2024
Fortnite’s next crossover isn’t with a cool new movie or a beloved comic book franchise. No, instead Epic is adding Tesla’s silly and ugly Cybertruck to the F2P game in a move that might be one of the worst and cringiest things yet. Read more
You Can't Play Steam Games In Your New Tesla Anymore
20.5.2024
Tesla, the electric car manufacturer run by social media website vandal Elon Musk, has announced that it’s rolling back Steam support in its vehicles. Booting up a video game on the scale of Cyberpunk 2077 from the comfort of your parked car is the definition of bougie and unnecessary, but that...
Tesla Recalls Millions Of Cars To Patch Mode That Could Kill You
13.12.2023
Tesla is recalling and updating almost all of its two million electric cars sold in the United States to place additional limits on their included self-driving assistance mode, Autosteer. Investigations have shown Autosteer can be extremely dangerous, and it’s been blamed for multiple accidents...
Elon Musk Brought A Gun To A Cyberpunk 2077 Recording Session
19.9.2023
During Cyberpunk 2077's development, Elon Musk begged developer CD Projekt Red to give him a cameo by interrupting ex-girlfriend (and mother of at least three of Musk’s at least 11 children) Grimes’ voice acting sessions with a gun, Walter Isaac’s new biography Elon Musk reveals.Read more
Amber Heard Spent Two Months Designing Overwatch Mercy Cosplay For Ex Elon Musk
12.9.2023
Writer Walter Isaacson spent two years following Twitter overlord Elon Musk as he worked on his biography Elon Musk, which released September 12. That thorough work paid off—readers can sleep easy knowing that one of the richest men in the world might be into Overwatch roleplay. Read more
Elon Musk's Mom Can't Stop The Mark Zuckerberg Cage Fight In New Game
27.6.2023
Elon Musk and Mark Zuckerberg will likely never actually fight each other in a cage match during a UFC event. (I know that’s a weird way to start a paragraph, stick with me…) However, we can all experience the alternate and better timeline where that fight did happen thanks to a newly released free...
Tesla’s Q4 Balance Sheet Shows Bitcoin Holdings Worth $184 Million
26.1.2023
Tesla’s latest balance sheet shows the company’s bitcoin holdings worth $184 million. Tesla did not sell any digital assets in the fourth quarter of 2022 despite the crypto winter and contagion in the crypto ecosystem. Tesla’s Digital Assets Valued at $184 Million Tesla Inc....
Tesla Still Holding $218M in Bitcoin — Elon Musk Expects Company to Be Worth More Than Apple and Saudi Aramco Combined
20.10.2022
Tesla’s third-quarter balance sheet shows that the electric car company is still holding $218 million in bitcoin. CEO Elon Musk claims that Tesla could be worth more than Apple and Saudi Aramco combined. The executive is also “excited” about acquiring Twitter. Tesla Still Holds...
Tesla Reveals Bitcoin Holdings Worth $222 Million in Latest SEC Filing
26.7.2022
Tesla has revealed that it is still holding bitcoin worth $222 million in market value after selling 75% of its crypto holdings. The company recorded realized gains of $64 million on its recent bitcoin conversion into fiat currency. Tesla Realizes Gains of $64 Million From Bitcoin Sale Tesla Inc....
Elon Musk Faces $258 Billion Lawsuit Over Alleged Dogecoin Pyramid Scheme
17.6.2022
Infamous internet clown and horrible SNL host Elon Musk and his two large companies, Tesla and SpaceX, are facing a ludicrously large $258 billion lawsuit over…uh…Dogecoin. As I’ve said before, 2022 is just a wild year of headlines. Read more
Game Devs Tell Elon Musk He's Wrong About What It Takes To Make Something Good
2.6.2022
The Ls are stacking up for Elon Musk. Tesla’s shitposter-in-chief got ratio’d over the weekend for trying to dunk on a satirical gaming site and is now taking heat for an incredibly aggro company email about how remote work is for lazy frauds. A lot of people in the tech world aren’t having...
Elon Musk Gets Into Embarrassing Fight With Video Game Site, Loses
31.5.2022
When I was six, I peed my pants in class because I was too proud to use my public school bathroom. Similarly, suave billionaire and alleged sexual harasser Elon Musk peed his proverbial pants after a Twitter scuffle with the satirical video game site Hard Drive. Neither Musk nor Hard Drive returned...
Elon Musk’s Dumb Elden Ring Build Proves The Billionaire Is Maidenless
11.5.2022
Elon Musk, who is 50 years old, is just like any other 13-year-old. Between long days spent fanboy-tweeting at Metal Gear Solid video game designer Hideo Kojima, drinking chocolate milk, and determining the definition and reach of “free speech”, Musk plays Elden Ring.Read more
Elon Musk Buying Twitter Sucks, But Marginalized Game Devs Aren't Leaving
26.4.2022
Yesterday, Elon Musk bought Twitter for $44 billion dollars, and a lot of people in the video game industry are unhappy about it. Some are making Mastodon accounts, others are making jokes, while others are voicing their concerns about the Tesla founder taking over the platform. However, a sizable...
I Played The Game Elon Musk Is Obsessed With So You Don't Have To
16.3.2022
Last December, Grimes released a new song from her upcoming album “Book 1.” The track, called “Player of Games,” was speculated to be inspired by her relationship with Elon Musk. One of the lyrics, “I’m in love with the greatest gamer,” got me thinking: what kind of video games does Musk play when...
U.S. Government Curious Why Teslas Allow Gaming While Driving
9.12.2021
When Tesla expanded its growing list of dashboard touchscreen games last winter, the update inexplicably allowed drivers to play them while the electric car was in motion. Almost a year later, the United States government is finally asking the company why.Read more