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Here's What The Super Mario Movie Sounds Like In Actual Italian


True to his word, Chris Pratt will not be “offending Italians” in his leading role in the Super Mario Bros. movie. In fact, his voiced performance in the official trailer was so lackluster that I can’t help but wonder: What if Mario had been more Italian? It turns out, I didn’t have to wonder...

That McDonald's Mario Movie Leak With Princess Peach Looks Real Now


Nintendo’s trailer for Super Mario Bros. Movie is finally out in the world, and so is Chris Pratt’s extremely normal dude Mario voice. The first look didn’t explain why everyone’s favorite Italian plumber lost his ass, but it does appear to confirm the recent leak of a Mario movie calendar by...

The Vibes Are Immaculate With Jack Black As Bowser In The Mario Movie


Nobody is excited about Chris Pratt’s Normal Dude rendition of Mario in Nintendo’s upcoming Super Mario Bros. movie, but that’s perfectly okay. The disappointment is balanced out by the sheer hype we now all have after hearing Jack Black as Bowser. It sounded like perfect casting the moment it...

Oh God, Are They Eating LeChonk In Pokémon Scarlet And Violet?!


At first glance, the news revealed in today’s Pokémon Scarlet and Violet trailer seemed just lovely: You can now have a picnic with your Pokémon! But then, it turned out, everything is wrong there. Because unless the Pokémon world has been hiding pigs from us, these people are eating...

Apparently The $70 Skyrim Anniversary Edition On Switch Runs Like Crap


Another year, another busted version of Skyrim. After being on the market for over a decade, Bethesda’s game that never dies just saw its Anniversary Edition update hit Nintendo Switch. (This edition, which hit other platforms last year, includes a new fishing mini-game along with other exclusive...

Nintendo Won’t Allow Topless Women On The Switch Anymore


It’s a sad time for titty lovers everywhere. Last week, the publisher of Hot Tentacles Shooter announced on Twitter that the game will no longer be available on the Nintendo Switch, because Nintendo no longer allows “uncensored boobs” on its consoles.Read more

You Can Give Your Stinky Pokémon A Bath In Scarlet And Violet


Sometimes you really don’t need more than a headline. But as we were watching the new 14-minute trailer for Pokémon Scarlet And Violet this morning, among the news of Terastalizing creatures and Far Cry-like base battling, one thing stood out to us above all else: You can give your Pokémon...

Pokémon Go's New Event Finally Lets You Evolve Cosmog


When Pokémon Go added Cosmog at the start of its latest quarterly season, the Season of Light, it was (of course) done in the most confusing manner possible. This fan-favorite pocket monster was finally part of the mobile game but in a form that apparently couldn’t evolve. Well, starting today...

The 18 Best Games For The Nintendo Switch


More than five years after its release, the Nintendo Switch is still dutifully chugging along, and still without the long-rumored Switch Pro. Compared to its supercomputer competitors, Microsoft’s Xbox Series X and Sony’s PlayStation 5, it’s by no means the most powerful place to play games today....

Here's A Canceled Zelda Tactics Game You Probably Don't Know About


I recently found out about a rejected pitch for a Zelda game inspired by Final Fantasy Tactics, and I find myself mourning for what could have been. Heroes of Hyrule was conceptualized as a DS game that combined tactical combat with puzzle-based exploration. Unfortunately, Nintendo scrapped Retro...

Time For A New Obsession: Official Pokémon Cards With Only Crochet Art


We recently celebrated the extraordinary Pokémon TCG card art of Yuka Morii, and her immaculate clay models photographed in nature. But it would be remiss to stop there, and while pretty much every artist working on the cards deserves recognition, our attention is next drawn to Asako Ito and her...

Dig Is My Least Favorite Shovel Knight Game Yet


I love almost everything about the Shovel Knight games. The retro-inspiration, bespoke pixel art animations, and pitch-perfect platforming—they are perfectly calibrated to make me go, “Yes, YES, more please!” Not so with Shovel Knight Dig, unfortunately. It’s the first release in Yacht Club’s...

Mamma Mia, Someone's Remaking Super Mario Bros. With A Realistic Chris Pratt


It feels like it was only yesterday when Shigeru Miyamoto pulled the goomba rug out from under our collective gamer asses with the surprise announcement of the bizarre Hollywood cast of the upcoming Super Mario Bros. movie. While the casting of Chris Pratt in the starring role horrified many,...

Stadia’s Exhibit Of Historic Gaming Blunders Is Now On eBay


Outside of the 2019 Game Developers Conference, before anyone had ever heard the phrase “Google Stadia,” sat a small display outlining the history of gaming. Dates and bullet points marked some of the major events, and on three pedestals sat a few of the industry’s most notorious flops: Atari’s...

The Next Time You're Looking For New Switch Joy-Con, Check These Out


My Nintendo Switch largely sat unplayed for the duration of the pandemic. I purchased it in the Before Times thinking it’d make for a great subway companion. But between the short battery life and it being uncomfortable to hold for long periods, I just didn’t ever want to play it much. But there...

$70 Version Of Skyrim Quietly Appears On Nintendo Switch


Almost a year after it came to every other platform, Skyrim: Anniversary Edition surprise-launched on the Nintendo Switch today. The newest version of the beloved 2011 open-world RPG includes a bunch of DLC, mod content, and fishing. It’s also $70 on Nintendo’s handheld hybrid. Gotham Knights...

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